"Jesus Christ, you sound drunk" I remarked to one of the sportsmen, halfway through this year's Classic.

"Well, that's...only...because...I'm talking" he replied with closed eyes and obvious slur.

While that may be the sort of drunken banter one might expect to hear at the October Classic, one might suspect that after seven years, this sort of witticism, intended or not, would go stale at a certain point. But let me reassure the reader, it does not. Not one tiny, stupid bit.

The October Classic has come and gone now for a total of seven years, and in that time, we have had lots of highs and just a few lows. This year, our only low, was a weather pattern of torrential deluge that forced us to play on a Sunday. I only rescheduled after much hand-wringing and near obsessive Weather Channel watching late into Friday night. After comparing Sunday's relatively nice day to Saturday's hellacious weather, it's safe to say I was vindicated.

However, because of the date change, we ended up having only 12 guys play this year. This was actually rather convenient for me, because I had been mulling over the idea of tournament contraction anyway. Specifically, I was thinking of going from four groups (16 players) to three groups (12 players). Based on the flow of the game this year, and the overall excitement of the wild card entry, it's safe to say that the three groups and one wild card format is here to stay.

This year's Brown Round was made up of Ryan Porter, Johnny O, and John Hebert (the group leaders); with the wild card being Rob Poiesz. It is interesting to note that both Ryan and Rob have been in the brown round for every year they have competed (4 and 2 years respectively). Those guys are absolute money.

The Brown Round functioned this year as was designed; in that the winner was only realized by the 18th hole. Out of the first 4 holes, Rob won all six skins, leaving only six skins for the last two holes. Basically, Rob had to only win one hole, or else hope that the remaining two holes would be won by two different guys. If either of those situations materialized, Rob would clinch the brown jacket for 2012. Things got intense when hole 17 carried over, leaving hole 18 worth 6 skins. Rob had to win it, or at least hope for halving. He got neither, as Johnny won hole 18, and in turn got the remaining 6 skins tying him with Rob. Faced with a tie after the brown round (only second time in tournament history), we as a group were treated to sudden death overtime via chip-off! The first chip-off resolved nothing, as both guys two-putted easily (though, I do recall that Rob may have blown a putt that could have won him our fabled jacket. It was during the second chip-off that Johnny Ouellette took advantage of a well placed chip, and sank with utmost ease, a 10 foot putt to seize brown victory! It is from this point on, that Johnny Ouellette became known as "Johnny O". Because the "O" is now for October. That guy was clutch all day. Brimming with poise and skill, Johnny seemed destined to win in his first year. The guy was absolutely blazing the entire day (golf-wise I mean)!

That brings me to another point I'd like to bring up. Johnny, my friend, I hope you enjoyed the relatively easy path you were given this year, because next year, the easy, ends. I will be striving much harder to group guys according to skill. I admit I dropped the ball this year in that aspect. I should have done my homework a little more. For example, as long as Paul, Ryan, and Johnny play this tournament, they will ALWAYS be playing in the same group from now on (without handicaps). This year, I placed Johnny in my group with Denis, because I didn't want to break up friends. But as soon as Johnny took his first and effortless drive that day, while in my group, I immediately realized my error. After his long, long drive, neatly cleaved the fairway, I looked away to the horizon, closed my eyes, and then quietly swore. I then muttered to no one in particular, "I've made a huge mistake...". From now on, I will slice and dice the groups as I see fit. In hindsight, Aaron should have been with us, and Johnny with Ryan, Dustin, and Brian.

In closing, I have to say, this year was a complete fucking blast! Everyone laughed, the weather was pleasant, we had a tight ending to the tournament, and we finally introduced new blood into October Hall! The 7th October Classic was a success!

Thanks to all who participated, and of course, thank you to all who read this drivel that masquerades as witty language.

Notes & Quotes

-Hebert had a backpack styled, camelbak. The bladder was filled with beer, while the rest of the backpack held one wine bottle and two wine glasses. Heebs is the classiest! During the video of "Don't Cross the Streams", this backpack is referred to when somebody mentions to Phil, "You should be wearing this". That is Hebert talking about the booze filled backpack (offering that a ghostbuster with a backpack, is better than one without).

"Did somebody run over a skunk?!"

-Phil had to leave early due to Sunday being a travel day for him. While on the subject of travel requirements, it should be noted that Phil drives five hours, with two young kids in tow to attend this tournament! (he puts the kids in the clubhouse bar while he plays--that is not true). Despite that, he still won this year's Bill Murray Award (in absentia). Bravo sir, bravo... John B was a a close second with heinous gold attire, a gold chain, and a blond short-fro.

-Much like Jesus, Hebert walked across the pond. However, unlike the holy carpenter, Heebs did it on the bottom of the pond, instead of the top.

-Brian was prepared this year! In fact, he even showed up Sunday morning with a pre-hangover. Attaboy! Way to get ahead of the curve. Most guys would have been content to get their hangover AFTER the event.

-Aaron managed his pull-cart in grown up fashion! So much so, that we are even allowed to use them again next year!

-Mitch smoked a lot of cigars. I can't forget to bring my pipe next year. Smoking and golf go hand in hand. Hell, even this year's Octoberman is a smoker!

-Denis performed a very nice routine with the flag pole (see vid).

-We all missed Paul this year. Unfortunately, he had a prior engagement that weekend in Ottawa. Hopefully in the future, his real life responsibilities won't interfere with the stuff that truly matters.

-There was a lot of gun shots going off for a brief period of time. I heard that the groups up ahead, figured that I was shooting people. Haha, I do run a tight ship.

-I have a record number of videos this year, which is a good thing, but unfortunately, there was an issue with the "First Drive". As most of you know, first drive is the birth right of the current Octoberman to have first drive. I had a vision for a clip showing all our names superimposed on a video of each of us chugging beer, one by one, finishing with Ryan nailing the hell our of the golf ball. It never got filmed due to human error. Next year year though, I'll have it.

That's all I have for now. If you guys have anything to add, email me, and I'll post it.